“Why are you taking that risk?” That question replays in my head each time I learn of friends who put themselves at risk of catching Covid-19. I fear for them because I care about them. I fear for me, living with immunodeficiency. What should I do? That’s not a rhetorical question.
For now, if they want to invade my personal space and put me at immediate risk, my answer is easy: No!
For now, if they are far from me while taking undue risk, I consider offering a respectful reminder, “I’m saying this because I care about you. We know that doing…(whatever they are doing) …increases your risk. I don’t want you to get sick.”
And/or, I might mention my distress. “It makes me anxious about me. This is not like choosing to ride a motorcycle without a helmet or eat chocolate chip cookies as your only nourishment . Choosing to…(do whatever)…helps perpetuate the pandemic, which affects me and my 94-year-old mother and all the other vulnerable people. I feel anxious when other people make a choice for me without my getting a say.”
This dreadful pandemic is changing how we relate to each other. In friendships built on love, everyone says and hears concerns as expressions of love. I’m asking for help finding the best words to convey my love.
