When suffering symptoms from treatment, emotions can hamper your ability to present an accurate picture of what’s going on. That’s a problem when it misleads physicians in their evaluations and treatment recommendations.
Not uncommonly, patients answer “I’m fine” when, in fact, they’re suffering from symptoms or not coping well. Your healthcare team wants and needs information about your side effects to provide the best care by tailoring your therapy. Often, changes can decrease side effects without compromising the chance of an optimal outcome. See: A pocket guide to Talking About Side Effects of Cancer Treatments (Harpham and Baile; MD Anderson Cancer Center).
What about if patients say, “I can’t do this anymore” when, in fact, they’re just conveying their misery? Or, they utter that while experiencing a wave of despair during a rough patch expected to be temporary on the path to renewed health.
Physicians base decisions about decreasing/stopping treatment on what’s happening medically AND in-depth conversations with patients—and not on one utterance. To help patients, friends and family can:
Validate: I hear you that you are miserable and, right now, don’t want to keep doing this.
Clarify: Let’s first find out about options to decrease side effects without jeopardizing the chance for the best outcome.. And, let’s see how you feel about treatment after you feel better physically, as your doctors expect you will.
Empower: You are in charge of your treatment decisions. Good care demands we reassess and abide by your top-priority long-term goals of care, including during rough patches.
In the pursuit of Healthy Survivorship, if feeling like you “can’t do this anymore,” try adding “right now” and find out your options for making things better.
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