An article touting the best advice for relationships includes a simple technique useful for Healthy Survivors dealing with a difficult or painful challenge.
In The NY Times piece, The Best Relationship Advice We’ve Gotten All Year, the authors recommend asking one practical question after friends or loved ones confide something upsetting.
Do you want to be helped, heard, or hugged?
That question shows patients that you are listening and caring. It helps you match your response to patients’ needs at that moment—or, at least, what patients think they need.
If you are the patient who wants to talk about something upsetting or annoying, it may help to proactively guide others’ responses by prefacing with your needs, e.g., I am telling you this because I need…
Your thoughts about what it means.
Your advice on what to do.
To vent without receiving sympathy or advice.
A hug, with no advice or attempts to fix it.
Healthy Survivors pave a path for healing communication.
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