Just days after learning I had cancer, my Rabbi said to me: People find out who they are when knocked down. He could see that I felt unmoored by the loss of my health, work, and confidence in my future. At a time when I didn’t recognize myself or my life, perceiving the crisis as a defining time inspired me to dig deep to bring my best “me” for the challenges ahead.
Those first weeks, more than a few friends shared a popular aphorism of Neitzsche: What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. They were trying to comfort and inspire me. Instead, the quote increased my anxiety by reminding me that my disease could kill me.
If trying to inspire someone, I suggest a quote from American philanthropist Bob Moore: My strength did not come from lifting weights. My strength came from lifting myself up when I was knocked down.
For me, the idea of gaining strength through the work of responding to a crisis helps. Like when undergoing physical therapy, the work of getting back on my feet will be demanding, painful, and exhausting at times. Knowing I’ll benefit in the end gives me the courage, fortitude, patience, and hope needed to strive to create a new normal that makes life worth living—however long that takes and however many setbacks I must endure before I get back up.
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