I picked out holiday gifts, wrapped them with care, and then delivered them to my doctors before the holidays. Did I receive any thank-you notes? Nope. And that’s A-OK with me. Here’s why.
My goal was to show my gratitude for their care by gifting something that would bring them pleasure. Importantly, I never want to add work to their agenda, which means I’m glad they are not spending time writing thank-you notes.
Besides not sending a thank you note, some physicians may respond to gifts in a subdued or awkward fashion. Many may say, “Gifts are not necessary. I’m just doing my job.”
When I was in practice, gifts made me a bit uncomfortable. (excerpt from Healing Gifts From Grateful Patients)
I'd be lying if I said the gifts didn't make me feel appreciated in a nice way. They did. They also made me uncomfortable because I was just doing my job. The warm feeling and confidence boost were offset by concerns about gift-born bias clouding clinical judgment, and fear of taking praise too much to heart and becoming overconfident. To guard against any of that, I'd quickly put gifts aside as soon as givers left my office and click back into professional mode.
In that article, I encourage clinicians to feel patients’ gratitude and then enjoy the gift.
As a Healthy Survivor, I do not want or need a thank-you note. “No extra work” is part of the gift! I savor the opportunity to give, which is possible only because of all the taking I did as a patient.
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